Yeah I know right!!

Hello my lovelies. I hope you are all doing well.  I so need to do a vlog to show you how I am doing.  But for now let me tell you how I am feeling and what has happened since the last time we spoke.  

Weight Loss I have lost in total 52lbs.  That is amazing!! I am shocked.  I've never lost that much in my life.  Ive gone down almost 3 dress sizes.  I'm starting to feel positive and confident.  It's the small things, like I'm starting not to feel like the jolly green giant.  When I say that when I was 52lbs heavier I would always feel awkward and in the way.  I'm glad to say I am feeling less like that.  

Last Sunday I went to my cousins and had a delish Sunday roast.  I ate slowly and carefully as I am paranoid about being sick or dumping.  It went down nicely and stayed down.  I was worried about eating in front of everyone, but they were super supportive and ignored me.  we did have a joke, my cousin saying "there ya go you greedy bitch"! Charming.

I've been cooking every day and trying new recipes, which hopefully I will share with you once I get myself organised.  I'm a little all over the place at the moment.  

I've joined the gym - Yeah I know right!!  But I also know that if I don't exercise my wobbly bits will wobble even more.  I still have 11 stone to lose so I can start toning the bits underneath.

I'm really liking myself at the moment.  I like the way, my mind is thinking and it's so happy.  I'm far from cured as WLS is not a cure but I am aware of food.  It's a different feeling from dieting and failing.  I am not dieting anymore which is really weird.  I am eating healthy and trying to make things from scratch so I can control fat intake.  I still don't fancy anything sweet and chocolaty.  As I typed that I literally turned up my nose hahahahhaa.

Overall The decision to have WLS was the best thing.  6 weeks ago I was getting ready to go in and now look at me all done and dusted and on my everlasting journey.

What I actually took with me

I was very frugal with what I took the reason being like always I overpack and never really need half of it.  So here is my break down for 3 nights

Toiletries

Toothbrush & toothpaste

Shampoo 2 in 1

Soap bar 

Flannel - not needed THG supplied

Deodorant

Clothing

Soft Bra x 3 

Knickers x 4

Pyjama's x 3 (I wore the shortie ones and just really had the top on)

Dressing gown (Wore around the hospital when I was getting moving and outside)

Slippers

Maxi - Dress to go home in

Cardigan

Medication

Vitamins & Minerals

Anti Acid

Anti Anxiety/Depression meds

Extra's

A fan

Ipad/charger/headphones

Phone/Charger

That is it my friends..  Simply because I did not want to over do it and I knew I really wouldnt care what I looked like once I had the surgery. This fitted in a beach bag.  So it was easy to carry.

Hope this helps

The Flip Side

Dear friends it is so good seeing you again.  Even though I am probably talking to myself, it all good.  I am not doing this blog for anyone but me.  Getting my thoughts and feelings out there.

So Dearies where did we leave off.  I think I was just about to go to the hospital..

11th July 2017 Mum and I travelled to Solihull.  It is quite a nice place there.  Our Driver Pete got us to Spire Parkways in perfect time for my pre op assessment.  I was nervous but yet happy.  I had my support group there on whatsapp and also my mum with me.  I don't think I could have got through it without her and them.  They were the ones who have been rallying round, making me laugh when things were getting tricky..

At the pre op the nurse checked, my heart, blood, weight, blood pressure and oxygen levels.  She was quite amazed how healthy I am.  I was really proud.  So my final pre of weigh in was 23lbs..  Yeah almost 2 stone.  I never thought I would even get to that much.

They were so nice.  Everyone was so welcoming and comforting.  I never felt rushed at all, no wonder I was so calm.

Mum and I went off to our hotel who again were very welcoming friendly and kind.  We were starving by this point.  I was feeling a little queasy all day, pre - op nerves.  So I really wanted a burger but I was clever, I had steak which was protein, mushrooms and tomato for my veg and carbs I had a few chips.  I never ate any desert which was a miracle..  I was really pleased with myself that I never had a blow out.

Anyway I was told that my operation was put back to around 4pm EEEEEKKKKKK!!! and to be in for 3pm.  I could have breakfast around 8 - 9am but nothing after 12.   As you can imagine the day of my surgery I was not good, my tummy was playing the fandango...  Mum and I decided to go and get some breakfast and then go for a walk.  That wasn't to happen.  The Hospital called and wanted me in straight away.  I went in to panic mode.  Lucky I didn't actually eat breakfast cos my nerves would not allow it.

So I get to the hospital when Mr Vijaar came and saw me.  He explained that Mr Richardson was running late and if I wanted he would do my surgery.  There I go another panic mode.  I thought on the spot and agreed.  We went through all the paperwork and low and behold my Angel Dr Richardson came swooping in like superman without the cape.  Before I knew it I was prepared for surgery ..........

Friends do forgive me if I am taking my time to catch you up.  I am all thinger and fumbs and the moment..

Tomorrow

Hello friends.

So tomorrow is my surgery.  Today I am travelling to Midlands with mum - Having the pre op etc.  How am I feeling.  Well.....................  It's all good..   I did a final weigh in lost another 3lbs.  I really wish it was this easy.  Unfortunately it's really not!!  I know if the surgery was not at the end of the tunnel, I would have caved weeks ago.

Hasn't it gone fast.  I mean really fast!! 4 weeks ago I was taking my first gulp of milk.  I still cant stomach the protein shakes.  Anyhooo I will update you when I am back with a long old story xx

So I will see you on the flip side..

Not many days to go

OHHHHHHHH!! I am wibbly at the moment.  But lucky for me I have so much to do..  Which is good.  It's keeping me super busy and I love it..

Almost 4 weeks in and I've lost a grand total of 20lbs.  Not bad I thought I might only lose around 10lbs.  So bonus all the way.  I've felt a little bit techy of late and this stage of my jur - hur- knee I am near breaking point.  However, saying that I am really pleased with myself.  Yesterday there was a B-B-Q at work, everything you can imagine, big fat cream cakes <insert drooling here>  Guess what I did?   I just turned my back and waddled down to my office, where I proceeded to open the fridge take out my lettuce, tomato and chicken salad, with no dressings and wept softly as I munched away..  HAHAHA!  But you know what, I benefited from all of that by the weight loss.

But seriously my mindset has really changed.  Before I would eat with my emotions now I feel like I have hope.  I still need to work on chewing slowly and hope that come in stages.  So another week in and completed.  I am really proud of myself.

I did my Facts & Figures today also - There is no noticeable signs in the picture but everything else has reduced.

See you later alligators xx