8 Days to go

OH friends!! What have I done????

I had some chocolate buttons.  I couldn't help it!!  They were bugging and bugging and I stuck my greedy hand in the packet and ate them.  You know what, I never even enjoyed it.  Karma is a bitch!! I really wanted to savour, but because I was being sneaky about it, I never enjoyed them at all.  So I am human.  This is exactly why I am on my journey to stop this consistent cycle of lose, eat, gain, repeat.

Oh well so yeah, that's where I am at at the moment.  The bunny food is doing it for me, however I discovered I really don't like the florette mixed salad bag and much prefer the tesco or Asda one.  I think I will pay a visit to Morrisons when I run out.  I know look at me looking at all the different options of lettuce.  My life is so full of exciting new things hahahahaha!!!

Other than my insane guilt, which will pass. I have been feeling ok.  I have been keeping myself busy, yes with the jigsaw puzzle, another exciting part of my life.  I feel much better, I noticed today when I finished work that I wasn't rocking side to side as I walked and was walking quite normally.  Well normally for me.  I have also noticed that my boobers are fitting nicely into my bra and I am not fighting to get them in.

I just have to keep positive.  I have done well. This is me being human.  I am allowed to make mistakes.  I can get back on track.  Tomorrow is another day.

Have a great week friends xx

Day I've Lost count..

Good Morning Friends - I hope you are well?  I am extremely well.

Week 3 was a total melt down of emotion for me and I did battle though it.  I did!!  Yes it was hard and yes I was at my end but I battled on.  How I did it was all in the mindset.  I know that if I don't lose the weight there is a higher chance of me not being the best I can be.  How is this different from your average diet?  For me I can see a light at the end of the tunnel.  Usually around the time in my average diet I would start to fail.  I would start nibbling bits and bobs, picking at this and that, eating and thinking oh that wont hurt, and basically sabotaging myself.  With the amount of weight I have to lose ( around 12 stone) it feels as there is no end to your journey.  Motivational meetings are designed for the moment.  When you are alone with yourself the demons start talking.  This time round there is a purpose.  Do I get a little angsty about why I couldn't do this before?  I'm questioning all the time.  I know in my heart that I can't do this long term.  I would fail, at any event, celebration or even when a fancy takes me over.  I would binge as I always do, I would justify the food I was eating.

I must say this is the biggest challenge I have ever faced.  As my surgery date hurtles faster towards me (10 Days) I am becoming more and more busy.  I have found myself projects that can keep me occupied.  I'm starting a new course on mental health.  I am also sinking my teeth into a larger project to do with the residents in the block I live in.  I'm quite excited for both.  Before and after surgery I will be busy mentally.  I think that's good for me to be occupied.  I have six weeks off work so I can't get bored really lol.

Anyway this week I have lost 6lb bringing me to a grand total of 17lbs.  That's loads.  I am feeling it on my tummy.  Of course no one else notices because I am still wearing figure hiding clothes.  I'm updating facts and figures so check out my chart.

Be well friends xx

LSD Day 15

Hello my friends.  What an amazing two days I have had.  I am not struggling at all and not feeling sick.  YIPEEE!!!  My mouth is so much better - and I dont have that milky feeling.  I am enjoying this so much more than the Milk Diet.  Dont get e rong it actually did me a favour to cleanse my palette.

So what am I eating?  Let me tell you..

Breakfast - A yogurt from my allowance.

Snack - none

Lunch -  100g lettuce - 100g tomato - 2 boiled eggs - 43g pasta - Sugar free jelly

Snack sugar free jelly

Dinner- 56g new potatoes - cabbage & sprouts (yeah it will be windy pops) chicken ( I can't remember the grams

Snack - sugar free jelly with 89g pineapple.

After the Milk Diet, I feel like I am always eating and also I feel myself getting fuller quicker.

I have exactly 14 days today.  The time is flying by.  Tomorrow is 13 days.  I can remember in March trying to find the best consultant for me. And now I am saying oh 13 days to go?.  They are going to go so fast because I am so busy at work.  woooooooo the end of year stuff..

See you on the flip side xxx

.....another 3 lbs

Hello friends, I hope you are all doing really well.  I'm still banging on about my tooth again lack of and it is really getting me down in the dumps.  So let's NOT go over that.  Instead lets do something fun like talk about the journey.

Last week I had a shock jumping on the scales and losing 8 lb wooooo.  This week I jumped on the scales and another 3 lb has gone.  That is 11 lb in all.  That's a massive 3% of my body weight, that is amazing for me.

What have I been doing.  I am still on the Liver Shrinking Diet which I must admit over the last few days I have been struggling.  But I am remembering what my Patient Consultant Rachel told me.  

"This is going to be the most torturous thing you will ever have to do in your life".  

I'm not feeling tortured as of yet but I am not that far away.  I have a little over 2 weeks to go, so in 3 days I will be over the hump, halfway through getting to the light side.

People have asked me how I am feeling, and I can't really give an honest answer because I don't know if it's the tooth extraction or the LSD.  I do know I am losing the weight and I am hoping to have lost at least a stone in the next 2 weeks, which will be another 3 lbs. Although I haven't shed bucket loads I can feel a difference.  My tummy definitely feels a lot tighter.  I have a bit more energy.  I think that is on account of having ZERO sugar.

I've updated my Facts & Figures which is really pleasing to the eye.  I've lost not only 11 lbs but also 3.5 inches.  I know, I know.   This is the stage in a normal diet where I think I am at goal and start eating again.  This time my determination is towering over the need to eat.  Don't get me wrong, it is not easy.  The fam were eating spag bol and I wanted to dive into it and relish in the flavours.  Alas, I had a glass of milk (taken from my 1800 ml allowance) and a sugar free jelly.  I am actually loving the jelly because they are keep my mouth nice, cool and refreshed.  The breath isn't so bad albeit in the morning I could strip paint.  

I've bought a jigsaw puzzle to keep me distracted in the evening and its working so far.  Though again on saying that I really haven't been toooooooooooooo distracted.  It will be nice to eat.  

Enjoy the rest of your weekend xx

LSD Day 9

It feels like a lifetime since I have been on the LSD.  I don't find myself wavering yet.  I think this is because of my tooth and I went to the dentist today only to find out I have dry socket.  The dentist packed it and the packing fell out leaving me all swollen and throbbing.  I am totally sick of it to be honest.

On a positive note - it is actually taking my mind off of the LSD..  I am trying to find the positive always and this is it.  I am hoping that it heals somewhat before my surgery in 3 weeks.  Worrying much?  Oh yeah!  My anxiety levels are going through the roof and I am struggling to keep Mr D away.

Lets hope that tomorrow when I go to the dentist they can do something.  I will sit there until they do lol!!

Keep happy friends x